I miss the SSA

[Justin]

moose nuckles are uncomfortable, but only when you stand up or breath

[Dandelion]

I will likely be receiving one from Justin upon his return!  *runs away*

[Justin]

I will likely be receiving one from Justin upon his return!  *runs away*

When I come back, I'll likely be as happy as a clam. . . no kicks, but hot sauce?

[Justin]

Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. . . he knew about moose-knuckle pain. . .  He forgot where he had stored his package. . . and then sat down on a wooden kitchen chair. 
"It get's her an ice-pack, it does this whenever it's told!"

a tale of groin pain.
It was a dark and lonely night, which I have always thought was the best time to commence any drive of 350miles or less. I was headed from NYC back to my Vermont apartment.  I had been enjoying my drive with only the occasional truck to pass.  I had driven about 100 miles and then the most gentle of realizations occurred to me.
It was subtle.  As if delivered over several different daydreams.  In fast, it disturbed several different daydreams.
I hadn't realized it at all, but from the moment I got in my car, I had. . . in fact. . .
been sitting on my testicles.
I elected to correct the problem, the way you'd hesitate to pull a knife out your own stomach. 
Probably smarter to leave everything where it is.
The re-adjustment was uneventful, but a wave of "oh no" got bigger and bigger.
I had about miles of REALLY bad pain.
From that day on, I have vowed to keep my sugarlumps in the front, where they belong.


Hey Dandelion,
I see you girls checkin' out the front of my trunks
I see you girls checkin' out my junk,
then checkin' out my rump,
then back to my sugarlumps

They look so good, that's why I keep 'em in the front